Well maybe a little.
But who wants anything else?
Many years ago (or so it seems) I became the mother of a daughter. One who wasn't born my daughter, but fate gifted her to me nonetheless. I received many questions, but the most common asked was
"What kind of person would allow this?"
There were and are still so many ways I could answer this, so I'll make it simple.
The kind of person who'd open herself and hold on to hope blindly? Why, she be me!
But who am I? For that question, one would have to understand the rest of my family.
This is my youngest.
At 2 years old, he's all personality and shrieking screams. He needs me a lot and though that can wear me out, I love every second because I know soon, he'll not.
He has a few sensory issue tendencies, just like his brother and sister, but he never lets that get him down an when it comes to a kid with such a powerful name?
Well, Hyperion Justyce Rayne takes the cake and then some!
My second born and insanely brilliant, my son has the brightest smiles. And behind that? A sensitive soul. Musically inclined, playing an instrument is one the only ways to combats his severe ADHD.
He also has Sensory Processing Disorder, but instead of being tactile defensive, my little cellist is a "Seeker". To be honest, I tend to have more behavioral problems with Lu and will get mad more often, but he always knows how to bring it around and make us all smile.
We already know why my oldest and beautiful daughter is so special. But really, there are many other things about her.
Like my other two, she was diagnosed with Sensory Processing Disorder and is tactile defensive. As my first, she helped me already understand by the time the others came along. My stepping stone so to speak.
Later finding out her feelings on gender led to another new discover of how little I knew about raising children. Life is never a straight path. Hell, it's not even windy. Then came what we face now.
Granted, this isn't anything new. It was mentioned during her IEP meetings when she did go to the specialized learning center for her speech delays and sensory issues. It was mentioned by the pediatrician and even her neurologist. I just wasn't ready to admit there was "one more issue" I had to deal with, but now, I'm learning.
Does that make her any less of an amazing little gift? Not. At. All.
So yeah, that seems like I've got a boatload of crazy pants going on. And that's just in my three children. I didn't mention family, husband, etc. Because honestly, if I looked at it, I'd probably drop my jaw.
It can be somewhat overwhelming but again, I wouldn't change a thing. Okay, well, maybe I'd change my need to withdraw inside myself and hide my problems instead of trying to talk them out with those that care about me. Or maybe stop trying to dump it on those that really don't care.
(I'm working on figuring out who matters and who don't. You know, all those years of childhood crap)
But in the end of it all, I'm me.
And these three looney blessings were gifted to me.
So who would allow this?
Because life knew that only I could do it.
With a pair of kick ass pumps and a smile.